My brother and I are about one year apart: 17 months and 18 days to be exact. However, if you were to ask anyone who doesn’t know us, just based on looks, they would tell you we are twins.
From people we meet in public, to even extremely distant relatives, and even in some cases teachers and peers, we have been asked the same question – “are you guys twins?”. Even among people we are close to we easily get confused; countless times have I been addressed by one of my brother’s friends by his name, by a cousin or a grandparent accidentally conflating us, or even my mom or dad getting us mixed up when they see a glimpse of one of us.
When I look at my brother, I see nothing but differences. For example, he’s taller, he’s skinnier, his hair is curly — my hair is straight. However, public opinion stands: we are more similar than we are different.
Growing up, almost everyone has rivalry with their siblings. Whereas, the rivalry with my brother has been more of a competition.
Due to our extremely close age, as well as the fact that almost everyone sees us as basically the same person, the struggle to be different is much more real. While it’s easy to become different, the competition was not necessarily about that. It was about being better.
No matter the situation, I have had the constant desire to be the better “twin”. From who can cook the best, who can clean the best, who can put on shoes faster, who is better at ping pong, who is better at making money, who is better friends with the dog, and most times: who is right.
But our competition goes much deeper than just surface level disputes. It also shows itself in much more personal ways: who is smarter, who is more attractive (even though we are almost identical), who is more talented, and even who our parents like more. The competition even extends to the future: who will be more successful, who will live a happier life, and which one of us will be most remembered.
While this constant competition may seem annoying, and stressful at times, it’s become an essential part of what motivates me to continue improving. All the hours I’ve spent to become better than my brother have had the side effect of making me a better person at my core. All of the good habits I’ve picked up in my life have stemmed from the desire to be better than him.
Consistently going to the gym was originally a thing because I wanted to be stronger than him. This desire has led me to live a healthier life. Wanting to be smarter than him caused me to study harder and pay more attention in school. As a result, I have earned better grades, and taken on more challenging classes.
Even in the future my desire to be more successful than him will likely lead me to higher levels of commitment and prosperity.
There is nothing stronger in the world than the desire to be better than someone else, especially when that person is a living showcase of your flaws. No matter what your career, there will always be someone out there who remains your competition, and the only way for you to win – or thrive – is to be better than them.
Life is a competition – no matter what, and some people fail to see that.
Luckily for me, I see it every day when I wake up and look at the personification of that idea: my little brother. By looking at him, I see only our differences or rather how he is better.
This constant comparison is what keeps me motivated and is what fuels my drive to do whatever it takes to win the competition that is life.
