Mead’s water fountains: a comprehensive review and guide (Humor)

Use this guide the next time you’re looking for a good water fountain around the hallways

Alejandro Aguilar Rubio

Of the working water fountains, there are some I would recommend and others I would stay far away from.

WATER! A commodity freely given to any student who wanders the halls of Mead High School, yet in varying degrees of taste and temperature.

Imagine you just get out of a sweaty P.E. Class, your throat as dry as your crush’s replies, and your tongue as gritty as the Sahara, and you only have five minutes to get to your next class. You need water, cold and clear, and it has to be along the way to your next class. And that’s not even considering whether the fountain is on or off (COVID guidelines, ew), or if its stream will even reach your lips.

Not to worry — I’ve taken one for the team and slapped together a list of the best (in my own humble opinion) water fountains in the school and rated them on accessibility (location), temperature (cold is better), and height (does the stream even reach your mouth?).

Without further ado, let’s begin.

D-wing 1st floor entry hallway

Alejandro Aguilar Rubio

Height: 10/10, comfortably reaching you on the taller fountains.

Temperature: 10/10, ice cold always, even on hot days, just needs a second or two to cool down.

Location: 10/10, easily accessible as it’s on the main floor in the middle of the school, at the very front of the wing closest to the center of the school.

 

D-wing 2nd floor mid-hallway

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Height: 8/10, have to push the button hard to get it to go up, but still pretty tall.

Temperature: 6/10, not that warm, but still, not something to be awed about. 

Location: 7/10, not many people just pass by the upper d-wing, but if you’ve got a class around there, it’ll do in a pinch.

 

G-wing 1st floor entry hallway

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Height: 3/10, even if you hold the button, you’re not getting it higher than a dribble.

Temperature: 9/10, nice and crispy, with a hint of metal.

Location: 10/10, near the commons, the cafeteria hallway, and the G-wing hallway, all at the same time.

 

Auditorium exit mid-hallway

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Height: 10/10, perfect as is, hidden gem honestly.

Temperature: 8/10, it’s cool and nice, but also tastes funny. 

Location: 7/10, not many classes around it except for Energy Academy H-wing classrooms. But if you’re on lunch, bam, right there on your way to the cafeteria.

 

B-wing entry hallway

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Height: 5/10, went up my nose as I drank — hostile and rude.

Temperature: 7/10, it’s just… water. 

Location: 8/10, outside the B-wing and the cafeteria. For the thirsty band and choir kids.

 

 

E-wing mid-hallway

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Height: 4/10, does not go higher than a couple inches.

Temperature: surprisingly, 10/10, icy and refreshing.

Location: 6/10, not great for student convenience, unless you have a class directly near it.

 

Gym hallway

Alejandro Aguilar Rubio

Height: 3/10, had to get my microscope out to make sure the thing was on.

Temperature: 2/10, warm and really weird taste. Dead rat in the water line? 

Location: 2/10, next to a bathroom and not near any class.

 

F-wing entry hallway

Alejandro Aguilar Rubio

Height: 6/10, average water fountain. Kinda metallic. 

Temperature: 6/10, it’ll do after a hard workout.

Location: 7/10, just for all the athletes that get thirsty during or after classes.

 

F-wing end hallway

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Height: 10/10, shot out so far I thought it’d splash the wall.

Temperature: 5/10, even thirsty following a workout I’d be hesitant to drink from this one. (Side note: decorative chewed gum and empty yogurt cup adorning the water fountains. Strange decor, but somehow matches the vibes of the F-wing hallway.)

Location: 4/10, not one I’d ever use unless I was in the weight room.

 

D-wing 1st floor mid-hallway (OUT OF ORDER)

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G-wing 2nd floor entry hallway (OUT OF ORDER)

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B-wing bandroom (OUT OF ORDER)

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(WHY ARE THERE SO MANY DEAD FLIES ON IT?!)

 

 

 

 

 

B-wing drama room (OUT OF ORDER)

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“Performers need to have an easy water access throughout their classes and performances,” said Ms. Mackey.

 

 

 

 

 

B-wing orchestra room (OUT OF ORDER)

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B-wing choir room (OUT OF ORDER)

Alejandro Aguilar Rubio